Strategy “I Need Space”
When anyone in a relationship starts to use this line, don’t take it at face value. When men use it, it usually means that they are confused about something, and if he has to be away from you, then it’s you or the relationship with you that he is confused about.
Aside from trying to sort out his feelings, he is also using this as an excuse to have more freedom away from you without having to explain his every move. It’s a smart move – but you’re smarter.
If your partner ever says this to you, sit with him and get down to specifics. What is he bothered about? How much space is he talking about? Is he going away or does he just want to be left alone for one night? As a wife or girlfriend, you should also have the instinct to know when there is something bothering him – work, family, peer pressure, trauma – and give him the space. However, when it comes out of the blue for no apparent reason, that conversation is a must-do.
Part of this strategy of a cheating husband is to increase his privacy from you. Thus, you may feel “outed” because he is changing his passwords, shutting off his cell phone, or giving you the silent treatment. The key: a sudden unexplained need for space and privacy.
How well do you know your husband? Do you believe he has told you everything about his past? If you have reason to doubt this, you can hire someone to conduct a comprehensive and discreet background check on his past.
Of course, hiring a private investigator is old school but is very effective and quick. Unfortunately, it can also backfire if it turns out that your husband never cheated on you because he could throw the “trust issue” in your face and the relationship may suffer a severe blow.
Strategy “I Need Space”
In addition, unless you personally know a PI, it’s hard to tell if the investigator is skillful or not. For these reasons, many women recommend doing the initial spy work on your own first.
A great idea would be to install a keystroke logger app on your husband’s digital devices. It’s a software program that is very hard to detect. There is one caveat: it may be illegal so read up on the restrictions so you don’t violate federal wiretapping laws and end up in jail. It is illegal to use this kind of software if you plan on stealing personal and financial data or to install a virus in the device. There are some states that declare it to be illegal for all cases including monitoring.
Another option would be to learn how to retrieve deleted messages. This trick only works with computers that have been synched with smartphones and is limited to most recent deletions